xanderkale

The week’s tweets for 2012-02-19

Kevin — Sun, 19 Feb 2012 17:00:00 +0000

And another night passes. #
A celebrity dies and my first instinct isn't to make jokes about him/her. Does this mean I'm finally maturing? #probablynot #willies #
This week is off to a blinding start. #
Now I remember why I don't usually try and get some sleep before Owen's off to nursery. #herdofelephants #
A word of warning for Killie folks. Wee man went to the Howard Park with nursery and he apparently saw a gorilla and a monster. Beware! #
And another night. #
@hellobuglers also, don't get him wet and anothernever feed him after midnight. in reply to hellobuglers #
The chances of Zoe falling asleep in my lap is directly proportional to how awkward and painful it is for me. #
This is weird. Plugged in my old broken Kindle yesterday to clear it out before returning to amazon. Left in in. When I switched on my PC… #
… it wouldn't boot up until I removed the Kindle. Now it's fine. Odd. #
Peppa Pig is at ASDA on the 20th. Don't know whether to take Owen to see her, or whether the sight of a 6ft tall pig will cause nightmares. #
Owens funny face http://t.co/K6t2yYHD #
Watching The Hangover. Love this movie. #
Yeah, that's my valentines movie. #
@twd3lr the one click purchase system is basically retail crack. in reply to twd3lr #
I can't read the headline "Vicar is found stabbed to death in locked vicarage" and not think "Ooh, Jonathan Creek is back on TV." #
Maybe @shawnlevy can answer this, but, in general, do film reviewers add their own "star rating" to move reviews, or does a sub add it in? #
Cos I read a short review that pretty much lambasted a movie as a waste of time, and then awarded it *** out of ***** #
I'd hate to read a * review. #
Zoe has passed judgement on two outfits by puking on them. #diva #
To be fair, the last one did look like it'd been made out of a carpet sample. #
@david1978pdx haha the way this guy tore into a *** movie, I'm assuming any attempt to put a * in print would simply set the presses alight. in reply to david1978pdx #
The boy loves a stick or four. http://t.co/aQ34pYqB #
One night of work to look forward to, then it's single parentdom for a while. Gonna be busy next week getting everything in order. #
Also gonna be hitting ebay – everything is for sale! #
I've also decided I'm (finally) going to get through The Sopranos and catch up on Breaking Bad #LoveOnDemandStuff #
The First Family – great book – has got me on a Mafia kick right now. #
BTW, I don't care about playing game (region coding etc), but would my UK Xbox 360 work in the US w/ Xbox Live / Netflix etc? #
Anyway, the babygirl's back asleep, so i'm going to get back into The Sopranos befoer @xander_jen gets up. #
@greg_walden cheers, will do. in reply to Greg_Walden #
@XboxSupport Hi, I'm moving from UK to USA soon. Will my UK 360 work in the US with US Xbox-Live and On Demand content? Thanks. #
@mambo32 i think we should just go to 2 machines for wave 2#Freetheleaving1 in reply to mambo32 #
A couple of hours to go and I'm an ex-postie/ace machines operator par excellence. #
@mambo32 #itisnow in reply to mambo32 #
8th June 2012. A date for the diary. Madagascar 3 comes out. The wee man LOVES these movies. #
Two very momentous events today. First, I finished The First Family, the history of the first organised mafia clan in the US. Great book. #
Second, I worked my last day at @RoyalMail. #
Now I've got to decide which book to read next. Torn between Cloud Atlas, Let the Right One In, The Night Eternal and Freedom. #
And it's only now I learn that Netflix memberships are universal and all I need is a VPN to access the US content? #ILoveMyVPN #
@neilcolquhoun1 I'm trying to. Going to be an interesting few weeks. Absolutely we'll have to, though with two kids logistics are difficult! in reply to NeilColquhoun1 #
Thoroughly miserable day in the Alexander household @xander_jen is off today. I'm here with both kids. Going to be tough. #
Wee man's been at the window since @xander_jen left saying "I wanna see Momma. Momma come back." #alongfewweeksahead #
I don't think getting to sleep will be a problem tonight. Staying asleep may be. #ZoeNeverSleepsForMe #
Yes!!!!!!!! http://t.co/O4rarR0L #
@kdsparky360 @demonjuice trying to dig up the original post by Kris' dad that confirmed fake & Kris wasn't on twitter but failing for now in reply to DemonJuice #
Today I'd like to get a bit of housework done, and maybe take wee man to soft play. Just trying to keep busy, basically. #
Babies are stupid. You're tired, so go to fucking sleep. Don't scream at me. #
@lindsayadaire haha i have thought about it, but i've also got a 3 year old who likes to parrot what you say so i'd have to be careful… in reply to LindsayAdaire #
I really hope @xander_jen finds some internet in Newark Intl. #
Wee man can drive me crazy sometimes, but other times he's really, really good with his sister. Making her laugh just now. #

The week’s tweets for 2012-02-12

Kevin — Sun, 12 Feb 2012 17:00:00 +0000

Well, that's that, i guess. #
Can we give 2011 another go? #
Zoe saw fit to give me 10 minutes of peace, so that's something. #
To bed. Wake me up when it's time to go to work. #
2012 has gone to shit in record breaking time. #fml #
@BennyL86 @timbersinsider there's a really toxic element to both fans but don't imagine it'll travel to the pacific northwest. in reply to BennyL86 #
Knocking this on the head, I think. It's been fun at times. Cya. #
this time next week #

The week’s tweets for 2012-02-05

Kevin — Sun, 05 Feb 2012 17:00:00 +0000

@xander_jen that must get in your nerves. in reply to xander_jen #
I've never read anything by @paulocoelho before. I'm going to (legally, of course) change that – http://t.co/5NgGdEot #prettyawesome #
Of course, it'll have to wait. I've just started "The First Family" by Mike Dash. http://t.co/BWZdCzEn #
http://t.co/KQHGz8hx – Wouldn't she have to prove it's not fraud, to win? Cos I'm sure Zenon could prove he could do what she does. #
@david1978pdx out and out goalscorer. a beast in and around the box. doesn't do much else. would need a "runner" alongside him. in reply to david1978pdx #
@david1978pdx ?s about his ability to score against the big teams. bullied the rest. fit, motivated w/right partner: 15+ goals in MLS, easy. in reply to david1978pdx #
@david1978pdx lost his way towards end of Rangers time. made a cpl of bad moves. needs to get this one right. in reply to david1978pdx #
@mrewanmurray as much as you could enjoy the tension! as fan of a diddy team, got to savour the big days when they come along, right?! in reply to mrewanmurray #
@jobodro @david1978pdx he works great with someone to run the channels along side him, ala Perlaza. personally think he'd be a great signing in reply to JoBoDro #
@jobodro @david1978pdx last cpl of yrs have been horrible. wrong move to Boro, lost his way since. if he can find a "home" he'll score loads in reply to JoBoDro #
@pdxnevets not the hardest worker, tbh. won't be first on and last off the training ground, put it that way. in reply to pdxnevets #
@pdxnevets known to enjoy a drink now and then. not to George Best levels, but he is Scottish after all… Spencer ideal to manage him. in reply to pdxnevets #
@varchild exactly. his best form at Killie came with Stevie Naismith alongside him – a tireless worker very much like Perlaza. in reply to Varchild #
@celery77 @david1978pdx strong but works best if he's just given ball around the box & allowed to shoot. why he needs a runner to open space in reply to celery77 #
@dcexiled pdxnevets clashed with Mowbray at Boro and "retired" from intl duty when he wasn't started. there's a en ego there, needs managed. in reply to DCExiled #
@dcexiled obviously meant Boyd clashed with Mowbray, nor @pdxnevets – missed an @ haha #
@jobodro @david1978pdx i agree. it was the wrong move, wrong time, wrong manager. He's been adrift since. Needs to get this move right. in reply to JoBoDro #
@jobodro @david1978pdx i'd think, if he was a Timbers target, he'd a Spencer target. his sort of player, wd slot in to the KFC shaped hole. in reply to JoBoDro #
@celery77 @david1978pdx would rate Boyd much, much higher than Cooper. Boyd operates much nearer goal that Cooper, but yeah, similiar types. in reply to celery77 #
had two hours of sleep, so it's a cup of tea before i try this sleeping business again. #
@jobodro @david1978pdx @celery77 haha. that is literally all he does. he's a goal scorer pure and simple, not a hard worker. #
Interesting reading for Timbers fans re: Kris Boyd on @agentscotland timeline – move to Rangers seems more likely. #rctid #
@duffyskeeper i tend to agree. if it landed and he was motivated and managed well, he's an All-Star. if not, he's an expensive dud. risky. in reply to duffyskeeper #
@celery77 @JoBoDro @david1978pdx often dropped for big games, but was cos they'd go 1 up top and Boyd can't do that. ditto with Scotland. #
@duffyskeeper at least it's be entertaining either way haha in reply to duffyskeeper #
Final thoughts on Boyd: 1) don't think it'll happen, should say that straight away. But if it did, 2) perfect for PTFC and the way Spenny… #
… sets his team up. 3) noone better suited to get the best out of Boyd in MLS than Spencer 4) but cost in wages etc vs risk of Boyd not… #
… Settling (distinct possibility) or just not being interested/motivated probably weigh against move. #
Right, sleep now. #
@RoscoePDX cpl of folks asked me about him. Just speculation. Pretty certain his heart isn't in an MLS move but it PTFC could be good fit in reply to RoscoePDX #
@Elfurdeball window closing, agents placing stories everywhere. Boyd cd run a bit, free agent so can sign post-window. in reply to Elfurdeball #
@Elfurdeball he scored loads at Killie – not a big team. A chance or two a game at best, and he took them. A predator. in reply to Elfurdeball #
@maofootball I think he wants the move to Rangers or England first. MLS seams like backup option. shocked if anything is signed in"24 hrs" in reply to maofootball #
@Elfurdeball I think if Spenny can steer him right and put the right guys around him, he'll bang them in all year long. Worry abt motivation in reply to Elfurdeball #
@Varchild @elfurdeball free agent, he can sign in uk post window so I think he'll wait & see how that shakes out first. Could be wrong. in reply to Varchild #
@Elfurdeball @maofootball some say smith don't want him, some say mccoist. Jelavic leaving is key – keep an eye on that. He stays, no Boyd. in reply to Elfurdeball #
@david1978pdx I just hope I get my commission! in reply to david1978pdx #
My brain betrays me by not letting me sleep. #
@goal_intl Kris Boyd to Portland Timbers in MLS? Rangers not interested? in reply to goal_intl #
@STV_Andy @STVGrant any of you guys heard about K Boyd to Portland Timbers in MLS. Being heavily touted ATM. #
Must admit, as a Killie and Timbers fan, it'd be nice to able to support Boydy again. Was outstanding for Killie – goal machine. #
@TimbersInsider if they pull a "bayern"…. in reply to TimbersInsider #
@STV_Andy ha looks like he's signed for @TimbersFC in reply to STV_Andy #
Wow. Boydy is a timber! This could be a massive coup for PTFC #RCTID #
@shebainpdx I'm now the resident Kris Boyd expert haha in reply to shebainpdx #
@MerrittPaulson huge Killie fan so remember Boyd coming thru. Huge talent. Lost his way a bit, but trust John to get him scoring. Kudos. #
Boyd & Perlaza = Goals. #RCTID #
@Varchild you can count on it in reply to Varchild #
@skywaker9 it's only January… Dare I say "season defining" haha in reply to skywaker9 #
@TimbersFC way to whitewash Killie out – the club that made him! Haha in reply to TimbersFC #
@Greener105th i'll have a blog post about him up asap in reply to Greener105th #
@JoBoDro Timbers have traded up. No doubt. in reply to JoBoDro #
The TA better get their thinking caps on. Boydy is going to need a chant. #timbersherointhemaking #RCTID #
You want to know what Boyd can do? See if you can find his goal for rangers vs Patrick and Kilmarnock vs Livingston. #RCTID #screamers #
Ok, Boyd related blogdump coming up in a few mins. My initial thoughts on the move – any follow-up q's, just ask. #RCTID #
@shebainpdx haha, you've got an "in" with Boydy in reply to shebainpdx #
@xander_jen NEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRDDDDDDDDDD! in reply to xander_jen #
@Caterjunes certainly no racist stuff and can't recall any sectarian incidents offhand. in reply to Caterjunes #
@xander_jen classic Mexican. in reply to xander_jen #
@Caterjunes he's a rangers fan and prone to daft-boyness but is pretty decent by all accts in reply to Caterjunes #
@maofootball the team as a whole were terrible. Strachan bought too many and lost control. Very few strikers would shine. in reply to maofootball #
@Varchild @maofootball got to wonder if Billy gave John a glowing report… in reply to Varchild #
@maofootball @Varchild Haha at work so haven't heard anything. I'll trust FO, billy davies over Borough fans! in reply to maofootball #
@Varchild @maofootball Mon the scottish mafia! in reply to Varchild #
@shebainpdx @Elfurdeball it was proven fake ages ago unless Kris has got control of it since. in reply to shebainpdx #
@DemonJuice @shebainpdx @maofootball @Elfurdeball if I've time I'll try and dig out forum post on it. Father i believe denied it was him. in reply to DemonJuice #
@HighRantDistric throwback in that he won't be dropping deep, going wide or overelaborating. He's thru the middle, uptop goalscorer. in reply to HighRantDistric #
Feed the Boyd and he will score. #Rctid #
I need #putaboydonit explained to me… #
@xander_jen so passe in reply to xander_jen #
@xander_jen well, it is your birthday soon…. in reply to xander_jen #
@shebainpdx ah i see. yeah, i saw one episode of that show. wasn't for me. makes sense now. in reply to shebainpdx #
@rickygervais … Sessions. in reply to rickygervais #
so tired. i've had 5 hours of sleep in the past 44 hours. fun times. #
Peace! http://t.co/3G5SOHjy #
I'm absolutely loving this book http://t.co/q5Q95ymc #
Operation Get Some Sleep When Zoe Is Down And @xander_jen Takes Owen To Soft Play (working title) is a flop. This kid just… knows. #
Watching docu on Bobby Fischer. Remember when chess was on tv? It's all poker now. #
@xander_jen I did. That's my boy. in reply to xander_jen #
It never fails. @xander_jen: "Zoe's fast asleep, I'm going to lie down." She goes, 30 seconds later, Zoe: "WaaaAAAH WAAAaaHHH"/ #fml #
Apple Scotland http://t.co/QQPqaZGa #
Sometimes it's easier to lie. #
@xander_jen yes, yes and FUCK YES. in reply to xander_jen #
"The Iron Lady" is a horror movie, right? #isshedeadyet #gravedancingshoes #
http://t.co/Md0gLBop – Keeping track of when Maggie Thatcher finally cops it. http://t.co/NAxSSH4c via @thatcherdeadyet #
I see that the "gender neutral" kid that the parent's wouldn't reveal the sex of, but was clearly a boy, has been revealed to be… a boy. #
Too posh to push…. RT @xander_jen: Why can't good things come when it's convenient?????? #
advanced warning – i'm getting my drink on Sat night, cos this weekend is going to be a hard one as it is. #
@mambo32 i thought you would at least understand the pressure of being supervisor. in reply to mambo32 #
@xander_jen sleep? what's that? i think i heard about it once but they may've been saying "sheep". in reply to xander_jen #
Hurricanes in Scotland a while ago get barely a passing mention on the UK national news. A bit of snow in Surrey is half the bulletin. #
Judging by the hashtag, there are a lot of Hedwig fans out there. #superbowl #iprefereaglestobehonest #butowlsarentbad #
Kris Boyd is a Timber,
He wears a Timbers hat,
And when he saw Seattle,
He said "What the fuck is that?" #RCTID #
@mi_chiamo_rene every single year winter takes people by surprise over here. in reply to Mi_chiamo_Rene #
Is George & Lynne still going in The Sun? RT @gideondefoe: I haven't read a comic for about 5 years. Can anybody suggest what's good? in reply to gideondefoe #

The week’s tweets for 2012-01-29

Kevin — Sun, 29 Jan 2012 17:00:00 +0000

It's Cartoon Time. An hour of quiet. #magic #
To be fair, the wee man hasn't been too bad today. Typical toddler. Should be an interesting week ahead – he's not in nursery this week. #
I'm so glad I'm on an Unlimited plan. #BTVision #Netflix #SkyGo #EurosportPlayer #
A little part of my childhood died this morning, watching Yoda being whored out to hawk shitty Vodafone services. #
Currently winding my way down to the depths of the bleakest, darkest hell. Or Microsoft Online Support as it's also known. #
@pdxnevets do you have a bigger version of that? #wallpapermaterial #
Watching "Sneakers". Classic movie, haven't seen it in ages. #obviousRobertRefordthenlooksexactlylikeBradPittnowremark #
Getting told funny stories this morning http://t.co/sYOPx8Sb #
@RRS still only 3 months. Bigger now than her brother was at 6 months! in reply to RRS #
All i wanted for my week off night shift was a bit of relaxing, maybe a cpl of movies and a bit of FM2012 here & there. #fatchance #
I swear this baby… as soon as I sit down to do something I want to do, like an alarm, she goes off. #shouldcomewithanoffswitch #
Arrested Development on @NetflixUK – worth the subscription for that alone! #bringonthemovie #
Time for a nice relaxing bath. Bring on the Radox! #
All this talk of Killie vs Ayr… everyone knows the big ticket to get for Sat is to the wee man's 3rd birthday party. #
Had a good play with wee man in his room today. I think with nursery and me being tired all the time, the poor guy's deprived of attention. #
@killiehendie it's still going. the wee man uses that, calls it his "pirate bubbles". in reply to killiehendie #
@mambo32 aye, they're pretty tasty bits of gear #revisionnow #ineedthebonus in reply to mambo32 #
There is simply no way you can put something on the floor without a toddler wanting to kick it over/stand on it/both. #
Zoe is doing that freaky sleeping with her eyes open thing. #makeitstop #
Weebo is up early so I've stuck on Secret of NIMH for him. #
On the couch, baby on my lap, kid snuggled in watching his movie… A good morning. #
Really really really not looking forward to long train rides tomorrow. With two kids. #
Holy crap, the Scotsman really think folk will pay £7.99 a MONTH for their app? #deluded #
Oh shit, the boy has discovered "Why?". Bring on the Mayan Apocalypse. #
Aaaaarghhhhh RT @owenrascalpants: Why? RT @xanderkale Oh shit, the boy has discovered "Why?". Bring on the Mayan Apocalypse. #
I turn my back for 30 seconds…. http://t.co/C55nG1KO #
My Kindle's dead #
@killiehendie he's a mate of Hugh Jarse and Don B. Asmartarse. in reply to killiehendie #
@franzhass a paper back? Nope, you've lost me there in reply to franzhass #
My awesome new desktop, thanks to @pdxnevets – http://t.co/UFM7faHv Bring on the new season #RCTID #
@paul_daytripper @shebainpdx at least preseason has started. that makes things go a bit quicker. in reply to paul_daytripper #
Thinking I may wait until iPad 3 comes out and pick up an iPad 2 on the cheap. #iwantiwantiwant #icantafford #
Owen is 3 today. If anyone wants to buy him an iPad, I'll pass it on to him…. (ignore my previous tweet) #
@xander_jen I think they're still plucking the chicken. in reply to xander_jen #
@neilcolquhoun1 Good to hear. One that's on our "To Watch" list. in reply to NeilColquhoun1 #
Dear US Consulate in Edinburgh, the toilets in the mall are not "five minutes away"/ #thekidgetsheavyaftertenminutes #
Dear Mall in Edinburgh, why oh why oh fucking why are the toilets at the very back of the mall? #anyfurtherbackandiwouldveneededapassport #
Dear US Consulate again, review your security process. I left and came back and didn't get scanned. At all. #tooledup #
Many trains rides today. To pass time @xander_jen and I were developing our new horror movie franchise, "Platform 13". Destination: Hell. #
We also realised that when you start talking in Trailer Voiceover Man voice, it's a hard habit to kick. #
Chronicle trailer just played. reaction: somewhere between hmm and meh. hmeh? mhmm? #
@qmpolly UK/US language differences give this tweet a whole different, umm, flavour. in reply to QMpolly #
@shebainpdx @QMpolly haha, it's more @xander_jen's story but, short story, telling Brits you've been wearing same pants for 3 days gets LOLs in reply to shebainpdx #
@shebainpdx @QMpolly it's jsut as well she didn't follow up with something about her fanny being sore. #anotherminefield in reply to QMpolly #
Since we spent Weeb's b'day on trains (he was very, very good btw – proud of him), I'm giving him a movie and cartoon day today. #
He's normally restricted to a cpl of cartoons in the morning before he gets ready, and an hour at night before bed. #
@charltonbrooker Netflix is doing it too. Now everyone on facebook knows my Dora The Explorer shame. in reply to charltonbrooker #
thanks @asda for stealing £5 from me and essentially calling me a liar! What service! What a company! #JuststicktoTescoinfuture #
and, oh, hey, look at that. guess who wasn't lying after all? #vindicated #stickingittotheman #oratleastthedickonselfcheckout #
The Lesson: Do not get between a Scotsman and his £5. #
@scarynetworkguy to be honest, it was more about the money #cheap in reply to scarynetworkguy #
Four (crappy) hours of sleep and fourteen hours later, do not a happy dad make. #
X-Box Live's billing system is retarded. And I genuinely mean to use that word. #
Essentially: You paid once with card, auto-renews on card, can't use paypal. Must be card. Card lost? You must cancel account, start new 1 #
@highme i don't want to use cards anymore, that's the problem. in reply to highme #
Seriously, Microsoft? This is a simple problem. It's not even a problem! #StaffedByMorons #
Oh hey, looks like the Agent just can back from his unscheduled lunch break. i'm assuming that's what it was. #
I add a card, and now it's a whole new set of problems. Why. Can't. Things. Just. Work? #
Ok, got my money back from ASDA, got my new Kindle and finally ironed out X-Box Live problems. Things looking up again. #
Now, if I could only persuade @xander_jen to let me cut Owen's hair, I'll be sweet. Don't want to go back out in that sleety, cold snowiness #
At least, not all the way up town to the barbers. We've got to get party stuff at Tesco. #
@xander_jen you know I'm all in for going short short in reply to xander_jen #
@xander_jen dragging the poor boy out into the freezing cold and wet. i don't know, mothers these days… in reply to xander_jen #
I much prefer thw fact the Kindle Keyboard has pictures of authors etc on the sleep screen ,as opposed to ads on the newer models. #
Only in Britain could a guy get derided for "only" reaching the semi-finals of a major competition. #andymurray #
@garyandrews i know. the guy's effectively got to win at least two "finals" to have a chance of winning any of the majors. in reply to garyandrews #
@herring1967 would like to see (hear) Me vs Me take their epic battle onto the tennis court. in reply to Herring1967 #
One of these days I'll get this boy's hair cut nice and short. #
it wouldn't be me opening a box without managing to cut myself. #
@mambo32 oof, there's gonna be floods of tears the morra. in reply to mambo32 #
Watched "Paul". Really pretty enjoyable little flick. #
@mambo32 12 oclock at mega mania in reply to mambo32 #
Today's the big day, here at last… Owens birthday party! Oh and Killie play Ayr or something too. #
Apparently Owen "doesn't feel well" & "needs chocolate". Now, I'm no doctor but I'm not sure chocolate is known for it's medicinal benefits. #
Today sees Killie face Ayr in the big derby match. Check out my piece on @BTLifesaPitch about it – http://t.co/HrOjfgzH #
Wee man's loving all his new birthday presents. Daddy is thinking "so… many… pieces. and what fun noises they make!" #onlyonceayear #
#Killie #onecupfinalsofar RT @mrewanmurray: not overly taken by the current regime/general signing policy. Maybe harsh, time will tell. #
A mish-mash of Rocky and Transformers, with some Spielbergian daddy issues has no right being that good. #RealSteel #
'The Falklanders eat fish and chips. How can they belong to Argentina?' http://t.co/Wot0Ayfs via @guardian #
Back to work tonight, so trying to stay up as long as i can to try and get back into a nightshift mode. #happytimes #
@serafinowicz where's the most dangerous place to sleepwalk? #PSQA in reply to serafinowicz #
@serafinowicz when was your first wet dream? #PSQA #
Day of the Dead isn't much cop, is it? #
I mean, I love Romero, but this is his Godfather 3. #

The week’s tweets for 2012-01-22

Kevin — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 17:00:00 +0000

Had to take off my ring. Don't want to get my tiger blood on folks letters. #
Finally! My years of Fist of Fun watching / @Herring1967 podcast listening pays off as he's an answer on Pointless @xanderarmstrong. #
Running on fumes just now. At least it's my short night tonight. #fourtogo #
@MattLawExpress Hi Matt, long shot, but we're a site looking for new writer, and would love a helpful RT – http://t.co/YzlJqhND in reply to MattLawExpress #
Watched #Sherlock today. It was pretty good. Still not convinced on guy playing Moriarty, but @xander_jen was a big fan. #
@futboldaddy I can see they tried something different and go for that funny/scary Heath Ledger Joker thing but didn't click for me. in reply to futboldaddy #
T-Shirt idea… RT @mi_chiamo_rene: Stop asking me about my reproductive organs. #
I think #Sherlock would've been better ending 30 seconds earlier. Those who've seen it will know what I mean #tryingtoavoidspoilers #
Right, before worktime, it's time to doze off on the couch in front of the football/ #
@xander_jen i just thought it was trying too hard to do the wacky/scary thing. Not bad just a Lidl Heath Ledger. in reply to xander_jen #
@xander_jen @scarynetworkguy prediction: last ep of S3, cliffhanger – moriarty is back. #
it turns out babies don't bounce. who knew?! #
@killiehendie come on grandpa, Chugginton is where it's at. in reply to killiehendie #
@mambo32 show me the money! #TeamSpendingSpree in reply to mambo32 #
Come on the #Killie Still on for the double. #
@demonjuice @maofootball you could ask this guy: https://t.co/uT6K8nZj in reply to DemonJuice #
@siyavumasports is that ex-Killie Dylan Kerr? #legend in reply to siyavumasports #
I can't see "Cruise death toll" in a headline and not think "he's finally snapped". #sorry #
@herring1967 Wasn't Monmouth a character in The Star Wars? in reply to Herring1967 #
Why won't this kid sleep? She's tired, her belly is full and yet she's refuses. #senddrugs #
All right, no-one move a muscle, she's out…. #dontjinxit #dontjinxit #dontjinxit #
@theycallmenels no Brandy in the house. We have whisky, vodka and Mojito. in reply to TheyCallMeNels #
Finally, I can skulk off to bed. #knackered #
I'm pretty much a wizard. I've managed to go for a two hour sleep and wake up more tired than before it. #
Watching The Taking of Pelham 123. Good movie. #
Seriously? The Odeon movie for parents to take their new babies to this week is the latest Mission Impossible. FFS Puss in Boots is out! #
Think I'm going to end up taking weebs to Rio Saturday or Sunday. #pleasedontsucktoomuch #
YAS! Not keeping up-to-date with movie news, I hadn't realised the new Riddick movie had gone from idle chatter to actual filming. Suh-weet. #
@scarynetworkguy good to hear. The Ice Age movies were generally decent enough, so i've hopes Rio won't be too bad. in reply to scarynetworkguy #
There is no way you're scrolling through channels and NOT stopping on a show called "Asian Beach Volleyball". #
@mambo32 female. i think. but you can never be too sure. #ladyboys in reply to mambo32 #
I'm really liking Netflix on the Xbox. May just have to punt LoveFilm #dvdsareso2000s #
@qmpolly @RRS it's running at 720p just now. just getting rolled out in the UK. Going to full 1080 soon. in reply to QMpolly #
@tmundal i love my blurays, but i also love convenience and the chance for random discoveries. in reply to tmundal #
@killiehendie they won 3-1 there last season! #shortmemory in reply to killiehendie #
@rrs @qmpolly AFAIK NetFlix aren't even offering the DVD service in the UK at all. all online. in reply to RRS #
fucking bowtie wanker #takemeout #
A little bit of Arrested Development before #MOTD Cannae whack it. #
I'm glad we've reached the point where, when watching football, there is mention a "semi", @xander_jen doesn't snigger. #hehesemisnort #
@xander_jen not for the first time… in reply to xander_jen #
I suppose I should go to bed, even though I'm enjoying the peace and quiet and no kidiness of now. #
Rio was allright. Wee man pretty much behaved himself, so all in all a good day out. #
@mambo32 trains,planes and automobiles. And dinosaurs. The usual. in reply to mambo32 #

The week’s tweets for 2012-01-15

Kevin — Sun, 15 Jan 2012 17:00:00 +0000

Love my American tweeps but one downside is i find all US sports tedious beyond words. Roll on the MLS season. #
American football is one hour of action crammed into four seemingly endless hours of air time. #
Basketball is the anti-soccer. Bball is gratification, football is anticipation. #
Baseball smells too much of cricket, and ice hockey… I'm saying nothing, @xander_jen is a fan and she knows where the knives are. #
But each to their own. I mean some people like the transformers movies… #
@tjmcwhiskers i'd prob like it more if i could keep up with the puck! in reply to tjmcwhiskers #
@tjmcwhiskers I've been to see winterhawks once and struggled. But i guess the more you see, the easier it is. in reply to tjmcwhiskers #
Should hold fire on hockey. Feel that when in the states getting a timbers ST will be dependant on getting a winterhawks one too. #
@mambo32 brilliant. i'm eating your chocolate tonight in reply to mambo32 #
Kris Boyd to Houston? I think the MLS might just suit him. http://t.co/2iDHvX21 #
@Zonal_Marking @bglendenning i fall btwn the two. Would like dangerous tackles gone but fear some ref think physical = reckless. in reply to Zonal_Marking #
Seeing his name pop up repeatedly in my timeline and having no clue who he is, i wikied Tim Tebow. 30 seconds of my life i won't get back. #
The Guardian, bastion of left-wing liberalism. But when story abt Scots independence appears, comments all go a bit "Daily Mail". Hilarious. #
RT @bbcferguswalsh: Harley Medical Group says it'd go out of business if it replaced PIP implants for free. say NHS has moral responsibility #
Previous RT is an interesting way for Harley Medical Group to declare "Hey, we don't care about you! We're dicks! Money! Money! Money!" #
0 toilet accidents to 1 a day for O since moving upstairs at nursery. Theres like a 75000 kids there, don't think he can make himself heard. #
Just checking out minimum standards for staff: children ratio. Gonna be counting kids in future…. #
Great news for Killie as we keep Dean Shiels and re-sign @bengordon91 on loan. Happy days! #
Took Zoe in for her jabs. Much less drama than with her brother. #
@mi_chiamo_rene Zoe takes after me. Owen after his momma. #dramarama in reply to Mi_chiamo_Rene #
I had this! It was aces! http://t.co/rEWBL4M6 #classicboardgame #
@RMcCracken91 @rossdunbar93 great point, that re: losa/sammon and shiels/heff. Hadn't thought of it like that. in reply to RMcCracken91 #
I really want a proper Bethlehem Steel or Fall River Marksmen shirt. Not some shitty screenprinted t-shirt or stupid logo thing. #
Old school heavy cotton and sewn on letter. Is there a place i can get a (cheap) bespoke one made? #
It's weird when you use someone elses computer to browse the net. There are ads? Who knew!? #
680MB of software. For a printer. A printer. A. Fucking. Printer. #
Anyone fancy going to Crystal Lake today? It'll be fun. #
What is the point in the "Time Remaining:" bit when it'll go from 2 mins to 1 min in 10 secs, then stick on 9 seconds to go for at least 30? #
Software developers, just admit you haven't a clue when your shit will be installed. Time Remaining: It'll Be Done When It's Done. #
I'm going for a nap. I'm getting old, okay? #
In a brilliant stroke of brilliant brilliance, Epson have designed scanner software that doesn't work with it's hardware. Brilliant! #
Spoiling it is pesky free, open source software that manages to do what Epson's brilliant software dept failed, and talk to Epson hardware. #
Thereby rendering my shiny new doorstop functional as a scanner. Boo! Hiss! #
How the hell did I not hear of this before? http://t.co/pF1i1NR5 (Fedex Flight 705) #
The magic words for getting a 3 year old to eat his dinner, you ask? "It's got bacon in it". You're welcome. #
.@xander_jen doesn't think that "Enter Sandman" is "an old song". It's over 20 years old FFS! #
Rule of Thumb: If there were people born after the movie/song/whatever was released, who can now vote, it's old. #
.@xander_jen would love this. RT @caterjunes: Only 2 weeks left to order tix for @timbersarmy Night at the @pdxwinterhawks on 2/4.#RCTID #
@dcexiled @Varchild @Finn_aka_Jeremy haha, it is very moreish. in reply to DCExiled #
Having finished "The Monster of Florence" (excellent, btw) it's time to get caught up on podcasts at work. #safetyfirst #whatbangingsound? #
@ericvespe i think you'll find the car got hit by Gene Hackman. #
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" … tell that to Samson. #
FFS. Finally get Zoe settled (after two hours) and then Owen decides he wants to go to the toilet, so Zoe's back up. #fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck #
Okay, she's back asleep. Let's see how it lasts before Owen engineers me having to move again. #
@i_judo_badly worst thing is you can't get mad at him for his horrible timing. in reply to I_Judo_Badly #
I think the part of my brain that found posting on message boards an acceptable way to pass my time is broken/repaired. Just can't do it. #
And yet, here I am at nearly 2am posting on twitter… #
@herring1967 i bet they don't even have a short cue either. in reply to Herring1967 #
Brilliant. RT @caterjunes: Hugged the boy, told him he's special and I love him. His response: "I farted." #

The week’s tweets for 2012-01-08

Kevin — Sun, 08 Jan 2012 17:00:00 +0000

Dinosaur Planet is like Walking with Dinosaurs by someone whose knowledge of dinosaurs comes from The Land Before Time series. #
Turns out Owen likes He-Man. #thatsmyboy #
Come in for overtime and machines all down cos of power cut. I could be in my bed. #
@killiehendie powers on. Had to wait on engineer from glesga to flip the trip switch cos we're not trusted to. in reply to killiehendie #
She's Electric. Top five Oasis song ever. Easy. #
I don't know why the republicans don't try nominating a likeable person for mayor, or whatever it is over there. Sure there must be one. #
I mean, I bet there were even a few Nazis that wouldve been the life and soul of your (non-kosher) barbeque. #
But there's not a single republican who'd pass a Voight-Kampff test? #
edge. of. seat. RT @daily_record: Good morning from Glasgow where we await announcement of the winner of World Scotch Pie Championships #
Think we'll be hitting Berlin in July. Anyone been? #
@shebainpdx Yes. Where have you been? The game kicks off in five minutes! in reply to shebainpdx #
That's my boy. RT @xander_jen: Owen just accused a rather large lady of being "a monster who will eat Owen's biscuit". #
@maofootball it's only going to be a cpl of days getaway from the kids for us. Definitely hitting Pergamonmuseum but at a loss after that. in reply to maofootball #
Find the idea of having to pay to get into museums weird. #
.@herring1967's Me1 v Me2 snooker podcast is either the greatest thing I've ever heard, or the worst. I should pod MeMe1 v MeMe2 debating it #
I'll have an R, an I and a P please, Bob. #
I really hope @xander_jen gets some sleep tonight. #
Noel G on Soccer AM the the mighty Killie play Dungdee in the cup live on the Beeb. Saturday sorted. #
Jen may get some use of the tv in the bedroom #BeGoneWoman #
Might just lock the kids in the cupboard under the stairs. #
Only kidding! we don't have stairs. It's by the front door. #
@xander_jen i did warn you not to smartmouth me. (2nd go, DYAC) in reply to xander_jen #
Well, this is fun. #
@scotzine correct. except it was offside. in reply to scotzine #
Craig Paterson just can't quite admit he got the offside call wrong. #
Killie just can't get going at all here. #jitters #
Never any doubt. 1-0 Killie. #
I just hope Sir Alex isn't watching @paska29. #ManuForManUtd #
I refute every one of @xander_jen's tweets. They're pure fiction. I am a gentleman. #
@smccue83 hear fucking hear. thought it was offside straight away. Paterson is doing my head in. #
Idea for the second half, Killie: When McGregor lollops forward, how about someone tackles the bandy legged fucker? #
@smccue83 aw this "Dundee could've been 1-0 up" pish. bollocks, they couldn't have been 1-0 up anymore than I could've been the next Shaft. in reply to SMcCue83 #
@xander_jen you hijacked my account! in reply to xander_jen #
Heff is itching for a goal here. Fancy him to make it 2-0. #Killie #
fuck. 1-1. #
Suarez, Adeyemi, Collymore…. Racism is the new black. Oh wait… #
Die Hard with a Vengeance is on. 3/4's of a great movie. #
Now AWOL is on. Van Damme classic. #

The week’s tweets for 2012-01-01

Kevin — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 17:00:00 +0000

It's weird, @xander_jen's pathological dislike of The Snowman. #mmusthatexmasreally #
Anyone want to swap lives? Just for day, like. Maybe a week. Or three. #
It's a Community marathon. #7thinarowandstillgoingstrong #
15 episodes of Community, and it's time to call a rest before I go out of my mind. #parksandrecisstillbetter #
Twitter, the place I can post "You didn't tell me you went to Bangkok" abt a Facebook friends pic of him and his "girl"friend & not get shit #
Installing Internet Explorer is not an essential update, MIcrosoft. Stop trying to trick me into it. #
Torn on whether to watch Phantom Menace bluray before I get my surround sound fixed or not. #podrace #
Watching Community. Wee man thinks Chevy Chase is Larry David. #
Back to work. Countdown to week off begins. #
There's not enough mad monk chanting in pop songs anymore #returntoinnocence #wtfwasthatabout? #
Also, Enya. Is Enya dead? Might as well start that rumour if not. If so, RIP. Seriously – in PEACE #
@xander_jen you suck #5minjob in reply to xander_jen #
What is the deal with asda never having bananas out at this time? do ppl turn into gremlins if they're eaten too late? #
@shebainpdx modern life milestone in reply to shebainpdx #
Happy New Year! Hope you all have had (are going to have) a happy Hogmanay! #

The week’s tweets for 2011-12-25

Kevin — Sun, 25 Dec 2011 17:00:00 +0000

… and Zoe is up already. fan. tas. tic. #xboxoff #
But hey, at least I got to start up FIFA 12. I almost managed to make it to the whistle for kick off too. #maybenexttime #hahanexttime #asif #
Sorebackitis. Pretty much useless here. Hanging out till home time. #hurryup #warmbathandbed #
My back is no longer completely seized up, but I just feel like an old man. I don't think all the sitting about last night helped, tbh. #
Bloodfist 6 – would I need to have seen the first 5 first, or could I pick the story up? #
After some experimenting. I've come to the conclusion that there is no comfy way to lie with your baby on the couch #tenroundswithTyson #
@mambo32 love it at RP, but it'd cost £££, no guaranteed benefit (knowing Killie they'd overcharge) & i think a lot of folk r comfy sitting. in reply to mambo32 #
@mambo32 plus it'd be a pain having to put the seats back in for our Champions League campaign. in reply to mambo32 #
I think the whole "a bit of work will do me good" thing was a mistake. #
Home. Deep heat on, painkillers,tea and bed. #backofa60yearold #
Why had I only discovered Bad Lip Reading now? http://t.co/A9iOupxp #outofdate #granddad #
Pleased to say my back is feeling better. Deep heat seems to be working. But then I thought I was better yesterday… #
It's a Winterval miracle! Zoe has fallen asleep in her rocker! #
Stupid shitty @samsunguk blu-ray player. First it won't play Star Wars, then I update firmware and it won't even start up. come back Sony! #
So i now have a stupidly large doorstop. thanks @samsunguk! #
@littlewoods paid for next day delivery on the 19th for an iPod, still not received it though showing as "delivered" on the site. #
FFS it seems like today is the day that companies and things are determined to annoy the living fuck out of me. #
Paul Rudd is awesome. #
@mambo32 need to put you on light duties…. Brian's machine. in reply to mambo32 #
Help i'm trapped in a room with grown men talking about wrestling. Send adults! #
@killiehendie i don't swing that way in reply to killiehendie #
12 days until I can quit @godaddy after their support of SOPA. #
Been meaning to quit after @godaddy's arsehole owner thought it would be cool to go shooting elephants, to be fair. #
@Mi_chiamo_Rene the one with Robert Duvall? in reply to Mi_chiamo_Rene #
@xander_jen "early night" in reply to xander_jen #
@mikeycattell lol ok in reply to mikeycattell #
Hour long Thomas the Tank Engine. Good job, @channel5_tv #babysitting #
Time to end the war on drugs http://t.co/wcNe8wq7 via @virgin #
Counting the seconds till @xander_jen gets up. exhausted. #
"What I love are the toys that come in loads of pieces, each with their own set of pointy corners." – No Parent, Ever. #
Cup of tea and watching UK Strongest Man #xmastradition #

The week’s tweets for 2011-12-18

Kevin — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 17:00:00 +0000

@xander_jen ha, "said". in reply to xander_jen #
back to work tonight. 5 straight, then a weekend off. then another 5 straight and it's xmas. #already #
@killiehendie hey, what's the with the rhyme, all of the time? Is it just a stunt, cos it makes you seem like a bit of a silly person. in reply to killiehendie #
@killiehendie are all the vans running? in reply to killiehendie #
Go to google. Enter "Define an English Person". First result. Truth. #
RTFMFT @xander_jen: I have THE best hubby. Thanks @xanderkale you are awesome. Xx #
why are the small pains the worst? i jammed my finger tonight, and it hurts so bad i want to bite the tip off. #
it's right under the nail as well. #
childbirth pretty much pales in comparison. #
i've written a 5 min stand-up set – open mic length – safe in the knowledge that i will never, ever, ever, ever perform it. #
btw tweet rate so high because the baby has fallen asleep in my lap & i'm trapped at the computer. she's getting heavy. i can't feel my toes #
babies have funky necks #
You know what's easy after a 10 hour night shift and aery little sleep. reading about particle physics. #
also, spelling very. #
@david1978pdx @elfurdeball Don't Ask, Don't Tell in reply to david1978pdx #
@xander_jen go to sleep! in reply to xander_jen #
@Xanneroo my boy, almost 3, is after your job. he likes to try and beat you to saying "that's right" after correct answers. in reply to Xanneroo #
One shift to go before my short long weekend #
I have yet to see a perfume advert that doesn't make me want to kill. #pretentiouswankery #
#pretentiouswankery is my new perfume. buy it this xmas or I will hunt you down & kill you in front of your terrified family #mykindofadvert #
the biggest downside to nightshift – daytime tv. oh, and missing family time etc etc, but mainly daytime tv. #
@Caterjunes took me a second to realise i hadn't tweeted that. in reply to Caterjunes #
#ff @mambo32 cos he's got piss all else to do during the nightshift #
#ff @SlideRulePass just because #
#ff KillieHendie cos someone has to. #
On a scale 0-10 with 10 being Terrible Parenting, how bad is sticking in headphones at full blast to drown out your crying baby? #
Not that I would ever do such a thing… #
@jimmycarr that's lacist! you know. like laces. in shoes. cos they sell shoes. also a bit racist, as in asian people say L instead of R. in reply to jimmycarr #
@jimmycarr also ! LOL in reply to jimmycarr #
Paper Roses, my post on how Kenny Shiels is doing at #Killie http://t.co/FfyZh11Q #
http://t.co/99jv0r7Y #
Just watched "The Ghost" on @tvfrombt – great movie, but totally called it. #
Want nothing more than a warm bath and then to crawl into bed, but i'm on kid duty until stupid o'clock. #
@xander_jen never happens to me. mountain goat. in reply to xander_jen #
RT @xander_jen: I'm off to do shots and dance my arse off. RT @xander_jen: Sambuca!!!!! RT @xander_jen: I think my back is really messed up. #
The prosecution rests. #
It's only now, with a kid, that I get enraged when movies/tv shows have multiple Santas. THERE'S ONLY ONE SANTA! #
@xander_jen aye, okay OJ in reply to xander_jen #
Time to catch up with The Killing II so we can watch it "live" tonight. #letsseewhocandotheworstdanishaccent #
Holy Fu- #thekilling #3togo #
one episode to go. season 2 > season 1 #forbrydelsen #
one of these days i'll get more than half an hour of totally kid free time. #putsonmysantalist #
but, hey, at least i got a whole five minutes of baby asleep time! #awesome #sarcasm #
can i go back to work tonight please? #
or now? #
2 hours and counting of non-stop baby crying/whining and no sleep. also trying to look after a toddler in the midst of potty training. #
Zoe finally, mercifully, falls asleep so Owen steps up to the plate. #
sorry, did i say Zoe was asleep? #fml #
rescued by @xander_jen and i can now enjoy the football #
If anything the roads and pavements are worse today. Glad my council tax isn't going to waste. #